From mattarn@123.net Thu Oct 28 09:36:40 2004 Received: with ECARTIS (v1.0.0; list lojban-beginners); Thu, 28 Oct 2004 10:02:19 -0700 (PDT) Received: from new.e-mol.com ([65.169.135.18] helo=mole.e-mol.com) by chain.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (TLS-1.0:DHE_RSA_3DES_EDE_CBC_SHA:24) (Exim 4.34) id 1CNDGR-0004h7-Se for lojban-beginners@chain.digitalkingdom.org; Thu, 28 Oct 2004 09:36:40 -0700 Received: from mail.123.net (new.e-mol.com [65.163.85.18]) by mole.e-mol.com (8.12.3/8.12.3/Debian-6.6) with SMTP id i9SGaTMY004308 for lojban-beginners@chain.digitalkingdom.org; Thu, 28 Oct 2004 12:36:30 -0400 Date: Thu, 28 Oct 2004 12:36:29 -0400 Message-Id: <200410281636.i9SGaTMY004308@mole.e-mol.com> To: lojban-beginners@chain.digitalkingdom.org From: Matt Arnold Subject: [lojban-beginners] My first work of translation In-Reply-To: <20041026195943.GN14527@chain.digitalkingdom.org> References: <200410201823.i9KINMMY025070@mole.e-mol.com> <20041020194452.GS32722@chain.digitalkingdom.org> <200410202101.i9KL10MY012837@mole.e-mol.com> <20041026195943.GN14527@chain.digitalkingdom.org> X-Priority: 3 X-From: mattarn@mail.123.net X-Originating-IP: [209.220.229.254] Content-Type: text/plain X-archive-position: 835 X-Approved-By: rlpowell@digitalkingdom.org X-ecartis-version: Ecartis v1.0.0 Sender: lojban-beginners-bounce@chain.digitalkingdom.org Errors-to: lojban-beginners-bounce@chain.digitalkingdom.org X-original-sender: mattarn@123.net Precedence: bulk Reply-to: lojban-beginners@chain.digitalkingdom.org X-list: lojban-beginners Dear Lojbanists, I would like corrections for the following poem, which I have translated into Lojban. It is simply a translation for meaning, and does not attempt to preserve rhyme and meter. There are several places in it where I am unsure that I am using language features correctly, or using the right word order. I also struggled with negation, especially at the end. First the translation, then below a gloss, then after that the original poem. -Matt Arnold, la epcat. i zu'i dasni do pemci fi la ancweidr. i to doi zoi secau cilta ka'e dasni skamipli toi i do poi le jbena limna ne'i le datni flecu cu dasni du'i le secau troci le finrtroutu cu dasni lei djacu fepri le cnino tadji tepi'o ka na nitcu le vacri i ju'o le tradadji pe le jutsrsaiborgu cu ponse cnemu i lei lenjo poi le kanla lojna vidni pe do cu ca'o kurji poi do mutce le sedjuno le ji'i maldu'e ku'o ga'a le ne'inai kampu prenu .i ku'i o'anai na mi mipri le suksa ja lenku terpa mu'u la prenrludaitu ki'u ca mi pensi le ka tavla jorne pe do i ma vasru .i je ma pagbu i mo'u mi terpa ni'i nu li re cu jmina poi le ruxmalvi'u .e le dakfu ka'enai zifre ze'u le sejundinai xadni ________________________________________ i zu'i dasni do It-which-is-typical-for-this Wears You pemci fi la ancweidr. Poem by Ann Schwader i to doi zoi secau cilta ka'e dasni skamipli toi (Oh lacking-wire type-of able-wear type-of computer-person) i do poi le jbena limna ne'i le datni flecu cu dasni You, who-are born type-of swimmer in data type-of flow, wear du'i le secau troci le finrtroutu cu dasni lei djacu fepri as-much-as without-effort a trout wears mass-of water-lung le cnino tadji tepi'o ka na nitcu le vacri new method used-for-purpose the-property-of not need air. i ju'o le tradadji pe le jutsrsaiborgu cu ponse cnemu Certainly behavior-style pertaining to cyborg possesses rewards. i lei lenjo poi le kanla lojna vidni pe do Lenses with eye corner screen of you cu ca'o kurji poi do mutce le sedjuno le ji'i maldu'e ku'o continually takes-care such-that you are in much knowledge to approximately bad excess ga'a le ne'inai kampu prenu .i ku'i o'anai na mi mipri to observer: outside common people. However shamefully I don't keep secret le suksa ja lenku terpa mu'u la prenrludaitu sudden and cold fear exemplified by that-named Luddite ki'u ca mi pensi le ka tavla jorne pe do with-cause during I think about the talk joinedness of you. i ma vasru .i je ma pagbu What contains? And what is the component? i mo'u terpa ni'i nu li re cu jmina completive I fear the 2 are added poi le ruxmalvi'u .e le dakfu such-that removal bad spirit and knife ka'enai zifre ze'u le sejundinai xadni can not free such long un-attended-to body. ________________________________________ It Wears You a poem by Ann K. Schwader (to a wireless wearable computerite) Born swimmer in the data stream, you wear as effortlessly as a trout its gills this latest means of never needing air. No doubt the cyborg lifestyle has its thrills: your spectacles with that eyecorner screen keep you so well informed it's near obscene to plebians without. I must confess, however, to a sudden Luddite chill when contemplating your connectedness: which part is host, and which the parasite? By now, I fear, the two are so enmeshed that neither exorcism nor the knife could liberate such long-neglected flesh. _______________________________________________________ Sent through e-mol. E-mail, Anywhere, Anytime. http://www.e-mol.com