you have to own this

Wonderstricken at the intensity of his vulgarity, and shocked at thesacrilege, I left; and from that moment Hardy Gripstone became a study. Every step in his tortuous course, every phase of his ostentation, everyenormity on good taste, was followed with ceaseless vigilance. Excessesthat would have startled the most thoughtless were pursued with restlessactivity; absurdities that drew forth a shout of ridicule were committedwith provoking good humor. No freak seemed exuberant, no follypreposterous, no extremity extravagance.

The joy of paternity, sinkingdeep into his nature, made every peculiarity more glaringly apparent. Money had been his idol, its accumulation the summit of his ambition;its reckless sacrifice in his daughters honor appeared the onlyadequate expression of his love. The intervals of his devotion werepassed in idle boasting, and to me he detailed every incident. There wassomething really touching in the abject way in which he mentioned eachtrifle concerning her.

Little circumstances connected with her dailylife were described as one would describe the traits of some rareanimal. His career of degradation seemed to have blunted every idea ofresponsibility. He looked upon her as a superior being, and heradornment as a sacred duty. The richness of her toilet, the magnificenceof her equipage, the glory of her beauty, became an inexhaustiblesurprise and delight.

The utter lack of congeniality, the barrier ofcaste that divided them, was indescribably sad. Rapturous admiration, gentle amazement, blind idolatry, meek bewilderment, the one twisted bybrutality to a living distortion, the other lifted by refinement to theembodiment of womanly grace; and yet they were father and daughter. Todo her justice, she strove in every way to testify her love andgratitude for her strange parent; the ties of blood asserted themselvesin her words and caresses, but they looked doubtfully out of her eyes. Educated far away from him, and amid other associations, she could notbe blind to his faults and shortcomings.

The social gulf that dividedthem, though bridged by her sense of duty, was ever present in herthoughts. I mourned over the remorseless avarice that made him what hewas; I almost regretted the culture that placed her so far above him;but, knowing the rude shocks to her sensitive nature, the ruthlesstrampling on every womanly instinct, I mourned for her the most.