Received: from [89.163.249.103] (port=45420 helo=bangpointsshop.com) by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1cMzT9-0006x4-Qk for lojban@lojban.org; Fri, 30 Dec 2016 07:51:51 -0800 Date: Fri, 30 Dec 2016 09:14:49 -0700 Message-ID: <519502738ni11772736jxj19502738oxzlojban@lojban.orgtdnz> Mime-Version: 1 Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii To: Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Subject: Your're (amazon) rewards expiring on New Years: prim.19502738 From: AmazonRewards X-Spam-Score: 2.9 (++) X-Spam_score: 2.9 X-Spam_score_int: 29 X-Spam_bar: ++ X-Spam-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "stodi.digitalkingdom.org", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see the administrator of that system for details. Content preview: we could be heroes We Wish You A Happy New Year Amazon e-rewards now available [...] Content analysis details: (2.9 points, 5.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: bangpointsshop.com] -0.0 SPF_PASS SPF: sender matches SPF record -0.0 SPF_HELO_PASS SPF: HELO matches SPF record 0.0 HTML_FONT_LOW_CONTRAST BODY: HTML font color similar or identical to background 0.7 MIME_HTML_ONLY BODY: Message only has text/html MIME parts -1.9 BAYES_00 BODY: Bayes spam probability is 0 to 1% [score: 0.0000] 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message 1.9 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_E8_51_100 Razor2 gives engine 8 confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.5 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_51_100 Razor2 gives confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.9 RAZOR2_CHECK Listed in Razor2 (http://razor.sf.net/) 0.8 RDNS_NONE Delivered to internal network by a host with no rDNS we could be heroes

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FROM BRANDON: You looked kind of freaky in that picture. But youre STILL my friend :p 12:36 p.m. Its going to take me YEARS of intense therapy to get over all of the traumatic experiences Ive had in middle school just this past week AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH (That was me screaming AGAIN) WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY I9 Today in swimming class we had a skills test on diving. Now, class, the object of this skills test is to measure your ability to dive AND retrieve the objects from the bottom of the pool as quickly as possible, our teacher explained. Youll be diving for seven plastic rings. Come on Whats the point What are we training for A dolphin show or something Why doesnt the teacher just sell tickets to see us perform and throw us fish as a reward when we do a good job Im just sayin But get this I couldnt believe there was no ambulance or some elite emergency team here to rescue us. You know, like the ones you always see on the sidelines at our football games.

Didnt it dawn on our teacher that we might need CPR or maybe even oxygen Or how about one of those supersized rescuehook thingies to pull us out of the water in the event of an emergency MacKenzie was next in line to take her skills test. When the teacher yelled DIVE MacKenzie dove into the pool, barely making a splash. Within seconds she had scooped up all of the rings and was back out of the pool with the fastest time in the entire class. She waved and blew kisses to everyone like she had just won a gold medal in the Olympics or something. That is so VAIN However, I was not the least bit intimidated. Dad had purchased everything I needed for my skills test from a yard sale last summer ME, READY TO DIVE IN MY SCUBA GEAR Anyway, when my teacher hollered DIVE I jumped in and grabbed al| the rings in record time. Even faster than MacKenzie My gym teacher congratulated me on my remarkable performance. But then she got an attitude about the whole thing and gave me a big fat D I was so DISGUSTED Sorry, Miss Maxwell, my teacher said. But youre diving for plastic rings, NOT sunken treasure No scuba gear is allowed Apparently, it was against the pool rules. But HOW was I supposed to know THAT The only sign about rules I saw said WCD POOL RULES 1. NO running 2.

NO eating 3. NO horseplay 4 NO peeing in the pool 5. NO floating toys There was nothing on that list that said NO SCUBA GEAR Thats when I totally lost it and yelled at my teacher. Sorry, lady, but Im NOT some humpback whale capable of diving to the deepest, darkest, most dangerous depths of the pool. I NEED my mask, wet suit, regulator, tank and scuba fins. Besides, the water is so deep my eyeballs could pop out. And I could die from decompression sickness. Worse yet, YOU didnt even bother to have an ambulance here just in case I needed to be rushed to the hospital So let me see YOU dive to the bottom of the pool without having a massive stroke or something But I just said that in my head, so no one else heard it but me. That diving skills test was SO unfair I should definitely get a doover Im just sayin THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 20 Im really starting to worry about my grade in swimming. If I get lower than a C as a final grade, my teacher will request a meeting with my parents.

OMG What if I end up losing my bug extermination scholarship and cant attend this school any longer And as if I dont already have enough problems, I noticed Brandon staring at me in the halls today. He actually tried to talk to me in bio, but I totally ignored him. AGAIN But then things got even weirder I was working in the library and minding my own business, and guess who just popped in like he owned the place or something BRANDON I know I couldnt believe it either Anyway, he asked if he could talk to me, and I said yes, but right then I was really busy putting away books. Then he said, Well, Ill help you put them away, and then we can talk while were working. And I said, Actually, you CANT help me because you dont know where the books are supposed to go on the shelves. Thats when he suggested that HE could help by handing ME the books so I could place them on the shelves. He was being very nice, sweet and helpful, and getting on my LAST nerve all at the same time So he was handing me books, and I was putting them on the shelves. Which made me SUPERnervous because he kept kind of staring at me. BRANDON KIND OF STARES AT ME WHILE WERE PUTTING AWAY LIBRARY BOOKS. Finally he cleared his throat.

Nikki, I just wanted to let you know that I felt really bad about you getting in trouble in bio for trying to do something nice for me. Like I said before, it wasnt that big of a deal Well, it was to ME. So I want to do something nice for you. Actually, thats not necessary. It was just a stupid card I dont think it was stupid. Well, I do I shot back. Brandon stared at the floor. Anyway, I thought maybe we could hang out at Crazy Burger this Saturday. I know the last time I mentioned it, you said you didnt want to go because you were SUPERbusy I could not believe he actually said that to me Not the part about hanging out at Crazy Burger. But that part about me NOT wanting to go to Crazy Burger because I was SUPERbusy. WHAAAT No way Brandon, You said you couldnt go to Crazy Burger because YOU were SUPERbusy HUH No, Nikki YOU told ME you were too busy and couldnt go. It was at your locker. I wanted to go, but that Saturday and Sunday didnt work out. Actually, you kind of stood me up, I said. No, I didnt. When I tried to explain what happened, you shut me down. Thats NOT what happened. I was trying to talk to YOU and you just walked away Lately, whenever we tried to have a conversation, we ended up fighting. Brandon and I just stared at each other in frustration For some strange reason, we were having major communication problems. I knew in my gut that something was wrong But I didnt have the slightest idea what it was or bow to fix if. Finally Brandon sighed and brushed his hair out of his eyes. Okay. So, how about Crazy Burger on Saturday At six thirty p.m. If youre not too busy, he said, giving me a crooked smile. Okay, sure If YOURE not too busy I said, smiling back at him.

Then we both kind of stared at each other and blushed. All of this smiling, staring and blushing went on, like, FOREVER So, it was official. Brandon and I were hanging out at Crazy Burger on Saturday. I couldnt wait to tell Chloe and Zoey the exciting news. But I didnt have to Chloe and Zoey were secretly spying on us the entire time I could NOT believe my BFFs would stoop so low as to do something like that to Brandon and me Especially during a very private and personal conversation about our friendship. Chloe and Zoey are always sticking their big fat noses in my personal business. But its mostly because the two of them really care about me. I have to admit Theyre the best friends EVER FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 21 Im still so excited about Crazy Burger that I barely got any sleep last night. Of course I couldnt wait to see Brandon in bio. SQUEEE We blushed, smiled and made googoo eyes the ENTIRE hour. I could see Mackenzie and Jessica staring at us and whispering like Crazy. But I didnt care. To be honest, I dont remember a single word my teacher said about todays lesson.

But it was the BEST. CLASS. EVER Im SO happy Brandon and I are FINALLY getting along again. I just hope spending time together at Crazy Burger will help strengthen our friendship. But right now my immediate problem is that I dont have the slightest idea what to wear on our first date. I dont want my outfit to be too dressy, but not too casual, either. It needs to be PERFECT I just stood there staring inside my closet for what seemed like FOREVER But unfortunately. I didnt see anything that was PERFECT ME, LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT OUTFIT I was DESPERATE So I decided to take DRASTIC action. I knew it would be dangerous because of the risk of exhaustion. But I didnt really have a choice. I was going to TRY ON all of my clothes superfast and mix and match tops and bottoms until I came up with a SUPERCUTE outfit Also known as a TRYONATHON When the smoke finally cleared, my TRYONATHON was a HUGE success I came up with the most FAB OUTFIT ever ME, MODELING MY FAB OUTFIT Now all I have to do is get through the meal WITHOUT: 1. dropping my hamburger in my lap. 2. accidentally squirting ketchup on Brandon. 3. laughing so hard that soda dribbles out of my nose. MUST. NOT. FREAK. OUT SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 22 OMG Todays the big day Brandon and I have a date at Crazy Burger in just a few hours SQUEEE By the time I showered, did my hair, and got dressed, it was 6:15 p.m. and time for my mom to drive me to the restaurant. I was a nervous wreck I had sat next to Brandon in bio, like, forever. But the thought of sitting next to him at Crazy Burger was more scary than those Friday the 13th movies that my parents refused to let me watch.

Hi, Nikki he said, smiling. Its cool that were FINALLY getting to hang out here. I quickly checked behind me just to make sure he wasnt talking to someone else named Nikki. Hi, Brandon I said, blushing profusely. For the next five minutes, we just sat, there nervously sipping our sodas and staring at each other with these big, dorky grins plastered across our faces. It was SO romantic Well, kind of. It felt like the butterflies in my stomach were having a big party. And some of them must have flown up to my brain, because I could barely think straight. Brandon seemed more quiet than usual too. Then I picked up the paper thingy from my straw and started wrapping it around and around my finger while I tried to think of something funny, witty, or interesting to say. I came up with Hmm, I wonder what stuff is in that ketchup Thats when Brandon picked up the ketchup bottle and started reading off all of the ingredients. Well, it says tomato concentrate, distilled vinegar, corn syrup, salt, spice, onion powder and other ingredients. I grabbed a piece of the straw paper thingy and made a giant spit wad and shot it right out of my straw, and it landed on the table in front of Brandons glass. SMACK Brandon was surprised that I knew how to make spit wads. Then he took a few sips of his soda. But when his straw made those loud slurpy noises, like SKURRSKURR, he coughed nervously and almost knocked over his glass.

Then we stared at each other some more. Next I took the salt shaker and poured salt into my hand and made these little miniature mountains while Brandon watched. Suddenly his stomach started making these loud grumbling sounds, probably because he was hungry or something. OMG Brandon, your stomach sounds just like a jet engine I teased. You should have seen the look on his face. I thought he was going to DIE of embarrassment Then, finally, our burgers came OMG They were crazy delicious Soon our nervous jitters went, away and we actually had an intelligent conversation. He gave me an update on Fuzzy Friends, his work for the school newspaper and his photography projects. I told him about losing a hair chunk at Salon Brianna, Mrs Wallabangers grandson and the horrors of swimming class. We both laughed until our sides hurt. It was amazing how Brandon was just so FUNNY and NICE Then things got SUPERserious. He said he felt awful when he heard that someone had plastered those crazy posters of me around the school. He said hes ALLERGIC to mean people We both agreed that MacKenzie was probably behind it. I really wanted to ask him if he had any idea how shed got her hands on that photo since Brianna had only emailed it to Chloe, Zoey and him.

But I was sure he would have been highly insulted and disappointed that Id accuse him of helping MacKenzie pull a nasty prank like that. So I decided NOT to mention it right then. Somehow, we ended up talking about the Sweetheart Dance. So, are you going I asked. No. But I would if the right person asked me. Does that mean the wrong person asked you Yeah, MacKenzie actually came to my birthday party and asked me. But I told her no. Since then shes been hanging around, trying to get me to change my mind. She even offered to have her dad make a sizable donation to Fuzzy Friends if Id go with her. Hey, we need the money badly, but His voice trailed off. I started playing with the straw paper thingy again as my mind raced. So MacKenzie had asked Brandon to the dance And he turned her down I was SUPERhappy AND relieved to hear that news. Now I could ask him to the dance If I could just muster up the courage. Well, maybe someone else wants to ask you but shes afraid you might say no, I said, blushing. Really Brandon blinked in surprise. Actually, Id probably no, definitely say YES Like, IF she actually asked, he said, staring at me. That was my cue Brandon was basically asking ME to ask HIM to the dance Well um, about the dance. I wanted to ask you if you um, think, er WE will have another BLIZZARD We got a whopping twenty centimetres of snow last time I babbled like an idiot. STRIKE ONE Brandon continued to stare at me. Nope. Do you want to ask me anything else Actually, there IS something Id like to ask. Okay So, would you like to, um, have DESSERT I hear the red velvet chocolate cake at this place is to DIE for Brandon smiled and nodded his head. Sure, Nikki That sounds great I wanted to kick myself. STRIKE TWO Um, Brandon, theres jjust one last thing I want to ask you I stammered nervously. Wait. Let me guess Brandon teased. You want to know if I want ice cream No Not that I replied.