Received: from ip52.ip-213-32-63.eu ([213.32.63.52]:33361 helo=themedreport.com) by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1cRnDj-00038T-3E for lojban@lojban.org; Thu, 12 Jan 2017 13:47:47 -0800 Date: Thu, 12 Jan 2017 14:47:11 -0700 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit Mime-Version: 1 Subject: Boom, your dead on the floor from a heart-attack: This will happen right before Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii From: "Jeanne Newman" To: Message-ID: X-Spam-Score: -1.2 (-) X-Spam_score: -1.2 X-Spam_score_int: -11 X-Spam_bar: - you have to move fast

Mayo Clin Report

This is a major-sign your seconds from a heart-attack

You've rung in the New Year and tomorrow your on the floor grapsing your heart

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All you need to is see this










He replied a minute later: As I recall, you promised to CALL when you finished the book, not text. So I called. Hazel Grace, he said upon picking up. So have you read it Well, I havent finished it. Its six hundred fiftyone pages long and Ive had twentyfour hours. How far are you Four fiftythree. And I will withhold judgment until I finish. However, I will say that Im feeling a bit embarrassed to have given you The Price of Dawn. Dont be. Im already on Requiem for Mayhem. A sparkling addition to the series. So, okay, is the tulip guy a crook Im getting a bad vibe from him. No spoilers, I said. If he is anything other than a total gentleman, Im going to gouge his eyes out. So youre into it. Withholding judgment! When can I see you Certainly not until you finish An Imperial Affliction. I enjoyed being coy. Then Id better hang up and start reading. Youd better, I said, and the line clicked dead without another word. Flirting was new to me, but I liked it. The next morning I had TwentiethCentury American Poetry at MCC. This old woman gave a lecture wherein she managed to talk for ninety minutes about Sylvia Plath without ever once quoting a single word of Sylvia Plath. When I got out of class, Mom was idling at the curb in front of the building. Did you just wait here the entire time I asked as she hurried around to help me haul my cart and tank into the car. No, I picked up the dry cleaning and went to the post office. And then I have a book to read, she said. And Im the one who needs to get a life. I smiled, and she tried to smile back, but there was something flimsy in it. After a second, I said, Wanna go to a movie Sure. Anything youve been wanting to see Lets just do the thing where we go and see whatever starts next. She closed the door for me and walked around to the drivers side. We drove over to the Castleton theater and watched a 3D movie about talking gerbils. It was kind of funny, actually. When I got out of the movie, I had four text messages from Augustus. Tell me my copy is missing the last twenty pages or something. Hazel Grace, tell me I have not reached the end of this book. OH MY GOD DO THEY GET MARRIED OR NOT OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS I guess Anna died and so it just ends CRUEL. Call me when you can. Hope alls okay. So when I got home I went out into the backyard and sat down on this rusting latticed patio chair and called him. It was a cloudy day, typical Indiana: the kind of weather that boxes you in. Our little backyard was dominated by my hood sg set, which was looking pretty waterlogged and pathetic. Augustus picked up on the third ring. Hazel Grace, he said. So welcome to the sweet torture of reading An Imperial I stopped when I heard violent sobbing on the other end of the line. Are you okay I asked. Im grand, Augustus answered. I am, however, with Isaac, who seems to be decompensating. More wailing. Like the death cries of some injured animal. Gus turned his attention to Isaac. Dude. Dude. Does Support Group Hazel make this better or worse Isaac. Focus. On. Me. After a minute, Gus said to me, Can you meet us at my house in, say, twenty minutes Sure, I said, and hung up. If you could drive in a straight line, it would only take like five minutes to get from my house to Augustuss house, but you cant drive in a straight line because Holliday Park is between us. Even though it was a geographic inconvenience, I really liked Holliday Park. When I was a little kid, I would wade in the White River with my dad and there was always this great moment when he would throw me up in the air, just toss me away from him, and I would reach out my arms as I flew and he would reach out his arms, and then we would both see that our arms were not going to touch and no one was going to catch me, and it would kind of scare the shit out of both of us in the best possible way, and then I would legsflailingly hit the water and then come up for air uninjured and the current would bring me back to him as I said again, Daddy, again. I pulled into the driveway right next to an old black Toyota sedan I figured was Isaacs car. Carting the tank behind me, I walked up to the door. I knocked. Guss dad answered. Just Hazel, he said. Nice to see you. Augustus said I could come over Yeah, he and Isaac are in the basement. At which point there was a wail from below. That would be Isaac, Guss dad said, and shook his head slowly. Cindy had to go for a drive. The sound… he said, drifting off. Anyway, I guess youre wanted downstairs. Can I carry your, uh, tank he asked. Nah, Im good. Thanks, though, Mr. Waters. Mark, he said. I was kind of scared to go down there. Listening to people howl in misery is not among my favorite pastimes. But I went. Hazel Grace, Augustus said as he heard my footsteps. Isaac, Hazel from Support Group is coming downstairs. Hazel, a gentle reminder: Isaac is in the midst of a psychotic episode. Augustus and Isaac were sitting on the floor in gaming chairs shaped like lazy Ls, staring up at a gargantuan television. The screen was split between Isaacs point of view on the left, and Augustuss on the right. They were soldiers fighting in a bombedout modern city. I recognized the place from The Price of Dawn. As I approached, I saw nothing unusual: just two guys sitting in the lightwash of a huge television pretending to kill people. Only when I got parallel to them did I see Isaacs face. Tears streamed down his reddened cheeks in a continual flow, his face a taut mask of pain. He stared at the screen, not even glancing at me, and howled, all the while pounding away at his controller. How are you, Hazel asked Augustus. Im okay, I said. Isaac No response. Not even the slightest hint that he was aware of my existence. Just the tears flog down his face onto his black Tshirt. Augustus glanced away from the screen ever so briefly. You look nice, he said. I was wearing this justpasttheknees dress Id had forever. s think theyre only allowed to wear dresses on formal occasions, but I like a woman who says, you know, Im going over to see a who is having a nervous breakdown, a whose connection to the sense of sight itself is tenuous, and gosh dang it, I am going to wear a dress for him. And yet, I said, Isaac t so much as glance over at me. Too in love with Monica, I suppose, which resulted in a catastrophic sob. Bit of a touchy subject, Augustus explained. Isaac, I dont know about you, but I have the vague sense that we are being outflanked. And then back to me, Isaac and Monica are no longer a going concern, but he doesnt want to talk about it. He just wants to cry and play Counterinsurgence 2: The Price of Dawn. Fair enough, I said. Isaac, I feel a grog concern about our position. If you agree, head over to that power station, and Ill cover you. Isaac ran toward a nondescript building while Augustus fired a machine gun wildly in a series of quick bursts, running behind him. Anyway, Augustus said to me, it doesnt hurt to talk to him. If you have any sage words of feminine advice. I actually think his response is probably appropriate, I said as a burst of gunfire from Isaac killed an enemy whod peeked his head out from behind the burnedout husk of a pickup truck. Augustus nodded at the screen. Pain demands to be felt, he said, which was a line from An Imperial Affliction. Youre sure theres no one behind us he asked Isaac. Moments later, tracer bullets started whizzing over their heads. Oh, goddamn it, Isaac, Augustus said. I dont mean to criticize you in your moment of great weakness, but youve allowed us to be outflanked, and now theres nothing between the terrorists and the school. Isaacs character took off running toward the fire, zigging and zagging down a narrow alleyway. You could go over the bridge and circle back, I said, a tactic I knew about thanks to The Price of Dawn. Augustus sighed. Sadly, the bridge is already under insurgent control due to questionable strategizing by my bereft cohort.









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