Received: from [198.8.81.10] (port=53128 helo=mail.urhomeimprove.com) by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1ciRub-0005Lb-7R for lojban@lojban.org; Mon, 27 Feb 2017 12:28:53 -0800 DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha1; c=relaxed/relaxed; s=dkim; d=urhomeimprove.com; h=Date:From:To:Subject:MIME-Version:Content-Type:List-Unsubscribe:Message-ID; i=calvin_britt@urhomeimprove.com; bh=bI0acYLiB70Bc8CiQSx0jpWDBsc=; b=Bk81Ak2fFpmfIhEo8rdjkv4SzOti0EXhHZIpJd5Z5mh1/cjvecajaiqoRA9Et+xAcp4VSp/OCThC knDABJs4B6ozBFWWIxlfnfA1emkZe/a3INd7SjoqQmJP164LWWrUMjlup5MBk+PEpbGf7uABIhpc s9TVFMtSdi3ivwAyL98= DomainKey-Signature: a=rsa-sha1; c=nofws; q=dns; s=dkim; d=urhomeimprove.com; b=vnc+/+msSsHu5X7PSzSPOqWRV0spAzC9reZtwVaIM80E/GO+tZJYQGc9Sy+HaWuI/5YJYsU2YpVm hvfXtWcmLA+r8vmZ+qUtLga3Uo51EVmW8flIhbCtDEzzZPO813G13G4JqiQ+n6o9hGEhwvv5Puod NVj/ny4piJd3scouhgs=; Received: by mail.urhomeimprove.com id hmi6040001g6 for ; Mon, 27 Feb 2017 15:19:06 -0500 (envelope-from ) Date: Mon, 27 Feb 2017 15:19:06 -0500 From: "Calvin Britt" To: Subject: lojban new anderson-window upgrade available 73198287 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_Part_7_1970579718.1488226736296" X-SMTPAPI: {"category": "20170227-151644-679-352"} List-Unsubscribe: Feedback-ID: 20170227151644679352 Message-ID: <0.0.0.2.1D29136BF13A47E.12CAFB5@mail.urhomeimprove.com> X-Spam-Score: 3.6 (+++) X-Spam_score: 3.6 X-Spam_score_int: 36 X-Spam_bar: +++ X-Spam-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "stodi.digitalkingdom.org", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see the administrator of that system for details. Content preview: Untitled Document Home Update New Windwows: #73198287 [...] Content analysis details: (3.6 points, 5.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: urhomeimprove.com] -0.0 SPF_PASS SPF: sender matches SPF record 0.0 HTML_FONT_LOW_CONTRAST BODY: HTML font color similar or identical to background 0.8 MPART_ALT_DIFF BODY: HTML and text parts are different 0.7 MIME_HTML_ONLY BODY: Message only has text/html MIME parts -1.9 BAYES_00 BODY: Bayes spam probability is 0 to 1% [score: 0.0000] 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message 0.0 MIME_QP_LONG_LINE RAW: Quoted-printable line longer than 76 chars 1.9 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_E8_51_100 Razor2 gives engine 8 confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.5 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_51_100 Razor2 gives confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.9 RAZOR2_CHECK Listed in Razor2 (http://razor.sf.net/) -0.1 DKIM_VALID Message has at least one valid DKIM or DK signature 0.1 DKIM_SIGNED Message has a DKIM or DK signature, not necessarily valid -0.1 DKIM_VALID_AU Message has a valid DKIM or DK signature from author's domain 0.8 RDNS_NONE Delivered to internal network by a host with no rDNS 0.0 MIME_HTML_ONLY_MULTI Multipart message only has text/html MIME parts 0.0 T_REMOTE_IMAGE Message contains an external image ------=_Part_7_1970579718.1488226736296 Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable =20 =20 =20 Untitled Document=20 =20 =20
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you have to change what you value and/or how you measure failure/success. As an example, lets look at another musician who got kicked out of another band. His story eerily echoes that of Dave Mustaine, although it happened two decades earlier. It was 1962 and there was a buzz around an up-and-coming band from Liverpool, England. This band had funny haircuts and an even funnier name, but their music was undeniably good, and the record industry was finally taking notice. There was John, the lead singer and songwriter; Paul, the ish-faced romantic bass player; George, the rebellious lead guitar player. And then there was the drummer. He was considered the best-looking of the bunchthe girls all went wild for him, and it was his face that began to appear in the magazines first. He was the most professional member of the group too. He didnt do drugs. He had a steady girlfriend. There were even a few people in suits and ties who thought he should be the face of the band, not John or Paul. His name was Pete Best. And in 1962, after landing their first record contract, the other three members of the Beatles quietly got together and asked their manager, Brian Epstein,=20
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// The third level is our personal values: Why do I consider this to be success/failure How am I choosing to measure myself By what standard am I judging myself and everyone around me This level, which takes constant questioning and effort, is incredibly difficult to reach. But its the most important, because our values determine the nature of our problems, and the nature of our problems determines the quality of our lives. Values underlie everything we are and do. If what we value is unhelpful, if what we consider success/failure is poorly chosen, then everything based upon those valuesthe thoughts, the emotions, the day-to-day feelingswill all be out of whack. Everything we think and feel about a situation ultimately comes back to how valuable we perceive it to be. Most people are horrible at answering these why questions accurately, and this prevents them from achieving a deeper knowledge of their own values. Sure, they may say they value honesty and a true friend, but then they turn around and lie about you behind your back to make themselves feel better. People may perceive that they feel lonely. But when they ask themselves why they feel lonely, they tend to come up with a way to blame otherseveryone else is mean, or no one is cool or smart enough to understand themand thus they further avoid their problem instead of seeking to solve it. For many people this passes as self-awareness. And yet, if they were able to go deeper and look at their underlying values, they would see that their original analysis was based on avoiding responsibility for their own problem, rather than accurately identifying the problem. They would see that their decisions were based on chasing highs, not generating true happiness. Most self-help gurus ignore this deeper level of self-awareness as well. They take people who are miserable because they want to be rich, and then give them all sorts of advice on how to make more money, all the while ignoring important values-based questions: Why do they feel such a need to be rich in the first place How are they choosing to measure success/failure for // = Why does that seem true Because being close with your family is ‘normal and ‘healthy, and I dont have that. In this exchange Im clear about my underlying valuehaving a good relationship with my brotherbut Im still struggling with my metric. Ive given it another name, closeness, but the metric hasnt really changed: Im still judging myself as a brother based on frequency of contactand comparing myself, using that metric, against other people I know. Everyone else (or so it seems) has a close relationship with their family members, and I dont. So obviously there must be something wrong with me. But what if Im choosing a poor metric for myself and my life What else could be true that Im not considering Well, perhaps I dont need to be close to my brother to have that good relationship that I value. Perhaps there just needs to be some mutual respect (which there is). Or maybe mutual trust is what to look for (and its there). Perhaps these metrics would be better assessments of brotherhood than how many text messages he and I exchange. This clearly makes sense; it feels true for me. But it still ing hurts that my brother and I arent close. And theres no positive way to spin it. Theres no secret way to glorify myself through this knowledge. Sometimes brotherseven brothers who love each otherdont have close relationships, // albums worldwide. Metallica is considered by many to be one of the greatest rock bands of all time. And because of this, in a rare intimate interview in 2003, a tearful Mustaine admitted that he couldnt help but still consider himself a failure. Despite all that he had accomplished, in his mind he would always be the guy who got kicked out of Metallica. Were apes. We think were all sophisticated with our toaster ovens and designer footwear, but were just a bunch of finely ornamented apes. And because we are apes, we instinctually measure ourselves against others and vie for status. The question is not whether we evaluate ourselves against others; rather, the question is by what standard do we measure ourselves Dave Mustaine, whether he realized it or not, chose to measure himself by whether he was more successful and popular than Metallica. The experience of getting thrown out of his former band was so painful for him that he adopted success relative to Metallica as the metric by which to measure himself and his music career. Despite taking a horrible event in his life and making something positive out of it, as Mustaine did with Megadeth, his choice to hold on to Metallicas success as his life-defining metric continued to hurt him decades later. Despite all the money and the fans and the accolades, // = Why does his lack of relationship with you feel like a failure Because were brothers; were supposed to have a good relationship Two things are operating here: a value that I hold , and a metric that I use to assess progress toward that value. My value: brothers are supposed to have a good relationship with one another. My metric: being in contact by phone or emailthis is how I measure my success as a brother. By holding on to this metric, I make myself feel like a failure, which occasionally ruins my Saturday mornings. We could dig even deeper, by repeating the process: Why are brothers supposed to have a good relationship Because theyre family, and family are supposed to be close Why does that seem true Because your family is supposed to matter to you more than anyone else // that his old band would forever regret their decision. He would become so famous that they would be subjected to decades of seeing him on TV, hearing him on the radio, seeing posters of him in the streets and pictures of him in magazines. Theyd be flipping burgers somewhere, loading vans from their shitty club gigs, fat and drunk with their ugly wives, and hed be rocking out in front of stadium crowds live on television. Hed bathe in the tears of his betrayers, each tear wiped dry by a crisp, clean hundred- bill. And so the guitarist worked as if possessed by a musical demon. He spent months recruiting the best musicians he could findfar better musicians than his previous bandmates. He wrote dozens of songs and practiced religiously. His seething anger fueled his ambition; revenge became his muse. Within a couple years, his new band had signed a record deal of their own, and a year after that, their first record would go gold. The guitarists name was Dave Mustaine, and the new band he formed was the legendary heavy-metal band Megadeth. Megadeth would go on to sell over 25 albums and tour the world many times over. Today, Mustaine is considered one of the most brilliant and influential musicians in the history of heavy-metal music. Unfortunately, the band he was kicked out of was Metallica, which has sold over 180=20
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