Received: from nobody by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with local (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1c8r6v-0003Sq-Lk for lojban-newreal@lojban.org; Mon, 21 Nov 2016 08:06:25 -0800 Received: from [192.3.209.233] (port=36600 helo=starttheoffers.com) by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1c8r6n-0003Rt-Tx for lojban@lojban.org; Mon, 21 Nov 2016 08:06:25 -0800 Date: Mon, 21 Nov 2016 09:24:59 -0700 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit Message-ID: <48325835k.8325835mc2c7e55fbfda4353ca10c7b6e541eeed_lojban@lojban.org561smc> Mime-Version: 1 From: eBayPoints To: Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii Subject: Your're Black Friday-eReward-$50: Cert. 8325835 X-Spam-Score: 0.6 (/) X-Spam_score: 0.6 X-Spam_score_int: 6 X-Spam_bar: / X-Spam-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "stodi.digitalkingdom.org", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see the administrator of that system for details. Content preview: unforgettable The Browns are next door:Victoria is fraternizing with Albert, andboth are exceedingly happy, although the latter has won greatly at thegame of speculationhaving played his cards well; so, Mr. Brown, after being packed in brown paper, steeped in vinegar, and wellsodawatered, joins the social party;finding Captain de Camp busyconcocting an extraordinary oriental mixture (the name of which we quiteforget) out of old bottles, from Victorias cellar; and telling atremendous Eastern story of a tiger captured in a jungle, after achase of ten hourshe should have said minutes, in a penny magazine Mr. Brown and the Captain soon became familiarin twenty minutesyou would have thought them friends of twenty years:so, beforethe last speculator had invested his last weekly sixpence in agooseclub, and drawn the last adamantine old gander; or the lastChristmaspuddingsweep swept away the chimerical puddings, that oughtto have been very rich, and everybody thought everybody else had won;before the last trader, who had sold out, dared to mount a notice, intimating that he had joined an Association to suppressChristmasboxes, the Browns and De Camps had attained that statedenominated thickan appellation that might, with propriety, havebeen applied to Mr. Browns brains;for he had obliged Captain de Campby discounting a bill, due twelve days after date (Christmas), and hadinvited him to dine on the morrow, to partake of the poultry, thatalways came up at Christmas, from Plumpsworth; and was taken out in avisit made by the worthy donor, Greatuncle Clayclod, during theMaymeetings, when he does a dozen shilling exhibitions in a day, andknocks up a flyhorse. So, rather late to bed; Mr. Brown making up hisDiary, as usual, on the dressingtablea rule he always observed, though, in some cases, it would have been better left until the morning;for, against December 24th, Tuesday, we find his feelings richlyexpressed in cramped caligraphy, upside down, bearing evident marks ofexcitement;having been pennedin a dreamwith hairdye, mistakenfor ink; [...] Content analysis details: (0.6 points, 5.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 1.0 FROM_OFFERS From address is "at something-offers" 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: starttheoffers.com] 0.0 T_SPF_HELO_PERMERROR SPF: test of HELO record failed (permerror) 0.0 T_SPF_PERMERROR SPF: test of record failed (permerror) -1.9 BAYES_00 BODY: Bayes spam probability is 0 to 1% [score: 0.0000] 0.7 MIME_HTML_ONLY BODY: Message only has text/html MIME parts 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message 0.0 HTML_FONT_LOW_CONTRAST BODY: HTML font color similar or identical to background 0.8 RDNS_NONE Delivered to internal network by a host with no rDNS 0.0 T_REMOTE_IMAGE Message contains an external image unforgettable

The Browns are next door:Victoria is fraternizing with Albert, andboth are exceedingly happy, although the latter has won greatly at thegame of speculationhaving played his cards well; so, Mr. Brown, after being packed in brown paper, steeped in vinegar, and wellsodawatered, joins the social party;finding Captain de Camp busyconcocting an extraordinary oriental mixture (the name of which we quiteforget) out of old bottles, from Victorias cellar; and telling atremendous Eastern story of a tiger captured in a jungle, after achase of ten hourshe should have said minutes, in a penny magazine Mr. Brown and the Captain soon became familiarin twenty minutesyou would have thought them friends of twenty years:so, beforethe last speculator had invested his last weekly sixpence in agooseclub, and drawn the last adamantine old gander; or the lastChristmaspuddingsweep swept away the chimerical puddings, that oughtto have been very rich, and everybody thought everybody else had won;before the last trader, who had sold out, dared to mount a notice, intimating that he had joined an Association to suppressChristmasboxes, the Browns and De Camps had attained that statedenominated thickan appellation that might, with propriety, havebeen applied to Mr. Browns brains;for he had obliged Captain de Campby discounting a bill, due twelve days after date (Christmas), and hadinvited him to dine on the morrow, to partake of the poultry, thatalways came up at Christmas, from Plumpsworth; and was taken out in avisit made by the worthy donor, Greatuncle Clayclod, during theMaymeetings, when he does a dozen shilling exhibitions in a day, andknocks up a flyhorse. So, rather late to bed; Mr. Brown making up hisDiary, as usual, on the dressingtablea rule he always observed, though, in some cases, it would have been better left until the morning;for, against December 24th, Tuesday, we find his feelings richlyexpressed in cramped caligraphy, upside down, bearing evident marks ofexcitement;having been pennedin a dreamwith hairdye, mistakenfor ink; pounced with carmine, and blotted with the smalltoothcombin lieu of paper; it is, moreover, curious for its allegoricalallusionslikening Captain de Camp to a brick, a downey card, a sharp file, and several other inanimate poetical images. Of our mild friend, Spohf, he is sleeping soundly upon a lightsupperobtained from St. Stiffs dairysome very thin milk, divestedof all unctuous qualitythat having gone to an epicure Captain, at theAlbert Villa. Poor Spohfs talent has not put many talents in hispursethese real racing times run over geniusthey would tunnelHelicon, turn Hippocrene to flush a citys drains, make Pegasus serveletters by carrying a postboy, and, in the end, sell the noble beastfor feline food:everything now must be tangible. The little organist, who had spent so many a Merry Christmas with the Brownshe has nopleasure to anticipate on the morrow, except the performance of his newhymn, The Star of Bethlehem, a composition of which the little tailorin the attic thought small things, for it did not compose him tosleep. : SAFE BINDSAFE FIND. The 25th of December arrives. The festival of the year has come. Christmasday commences with the rising of the cook, who finished theevening, kneading and gaping over pies and puddings; and wakes with thesame operation, gaping and kneading her eyes, which do not fairly openuntil she comes to look after her first carethe pudding:the fire, having been made up over night, is discovered a beauty; but, behold, within the copper, the pudding has dissolvedthere is nothingto be found but a cloth, which must have been boiling all night in arich plumsoup, the string having come untied; or rather, never beentied at all, but popped in by Mrs. B. Without attending to thatoperation:a piece of neglect, for which the cook gets warning, andall the servants rateduntil the bells of St. Stiffs remind Mrs. B. That it is time to depart, for the duties of a Christian, to eschew allthe vanities of this wicked world, in a rich purple Genoa velvet paletotand duck of a plum bonnet. That day Mr. Churchwarden Browns pue wouldnot hold all, so Mrs. Strap, the pueopener, had to manoeuvre byappropriating part of another to their use, losing her Christmasbox forthe offence against its owner, Mr. Din, the coppersmith. Mr. Spohfs Christmas hymn is much liked, and is really so fine as tomake that essence of gentleness, himself, temporarily egotistical; hewonders what impression it has made upon Miss Jemima, and the strangegentleman who is so attentive to hercould he do as much? But Mr. Latimer de Camp is heedless of other good things flying about him; for, upon the walk home after service, among the savoury Christmas dinnersthat are hurrying in every direction, he is so abstracted as to find asuckingpig in his stomach, and not a little gravy spilt upon histrowsers, compelling him to change them, upon his arrival at home, for aneat pair of young Browns.

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Mr. Spohf, having played all out of St. Stiff the Martyr, walks homemoodily:instead of finding his dinner as usual, the chop and potato, he learns that his landlord, Mr. Strap, the greengrocer, has stopped thesupplies. It is quarterdayStrap thinks of the five weeks arrears, and Mr. Spohfs inability to pay for his lodgings; so, Mr. And Mrs. Strap have surprised him, by preparing a huge leg of mutton and pudding;for they know he does not, as of old, go to the Willer. After thishumble repast, which was relished as much as any could be, and was farless likely to leave unpleasant sensations than if it had been morecostly, they draw round the fire; and master Ichabod Strap, one of thechoristers of St. Stiff the Martyr, is playing with a shilling, polishing the coin upon his sleeveit is the identical one said to havebeen put in the plate by Captain de Camp, and given by Mr. Flyntflayer(the gentleman who held the gothic platter) to Mrs. Strap, thepueopener, advising her at the same time to nail it to thecountera counterfeit to deter smashers. But, somehow, the coinseemed doomed to remain unholy, for no orifice or artifice could haverendered it a lucky one; it was shown to Mr. Spohf, who thought itbad, and that it might have gotten into the plate by mistake; Mrs. Strapknew it badan intentional perpetration, and, like the giver, notworth a dump; Mr. Strap not only thought it bad, but proved it so; for, after having spun, sounded, and eaten a portion of it, he cast the coininto the glowing fire, where the silver quickly changed, dropping, likequicksilver, among the ashes, to be picked out by Ichabod, very unlikea sterling coin. Old Strap, who had taken the pledge, but since introduced anexceptional clause in favour of feasts and festivals, gets out the blackbottle for fraternitys sake. They take a pipe apiece, and so softenedis the little organist with their genuine unsophisticated kindness, thathe sees all his cares fly, and nothing but joys in the wreathed curls ofsmoke betaking themselves up the chimney:he sees Messrs. Blow andGrumble, the eminent organbuilders, making a fortune by his newmovement; having purchased and patented it: he has found a publisherfor his church music, and sold his old opera. Captain de Camp hasvanished in smokehe has exploded of spontaneous combustion, they findhim all deceit, leaving a glass eye and a cork leg. Mr. Latimer gets theColonial Bishopric of Bushantee, in New Zealand, and cuts Miss Jemima. Mr. Wellesley having gone to India for glory, returns with it, a hook, and a patch over his eye. Miss Angelina vows to die a virgin. Mr. Brownsays to Mr. Spohf, my sonMr. Spohf says to Mr. Brown, my fatherMr. Strap is standing in triumph upon a pyramid of carpets to beat, viewing a lesser one of boots to brush; having been entrusted withmore messages than mortal ever could deliver; whilst innumerablevans, bearing the name of Strap, traverse innumerable roads in Town andCountry. Mrs. Strap, dressed in a plain plum silk, turns a mahoganymangle, and gets up nothing but fine things. Ichabod has cut thechoir, and made his dbut in an opera as Herr Strapii, a perfecttriumph.





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