Received: from nobody by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with local (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1cOtEY-0004RX-BW for lojban-newreal@lojban.org; Wed, 04 Jan 2017 13:36:34 -0800 Received: from [198.167.143.58] (port=59452 helo=timetobreakthebed.com) by stodi.digitalkingdom.org with esmtp (Exim 4.87) (envelope-from ) id 1cOtET-0004Ox-PJ for lojban@lojban.org; Wed, 04 Jan 2017 13:36:33 -0800 Date: Wed, 04 Jan 2017 14:59:50 -0700 From: "Adrian Bowman" Mime-Version: 1 To: Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii Subject: Eat this and have incredible-sex this weekend Message-ID: Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit X-Spam-Score: 2.9 (++) X-Spam_score: 2.9 X-Spam_score_int: 29 X-Spam_bar: ++ X-Spam-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "stodi.digitalkingdom.org", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see the administrator of that system for details. Content preview: try this and then break the bed These days a decent meal out in the stepwise worlds was pretty easy to obtain, for him; the pioneering steppers kind of liked to see him around, they knew his name and reputation, and treated him as if he were a lucky mascot. And a meal was always his for the asking from any of the halfway houses, the travellers lodges that were springing up across the nearer Earths. But it didnt pay to be a scrounger, Sister Agnes had always said, and so he always took a freshkilled deer along, or some wild fowl. The greener pioneers liked their meat fresh but had as yet not come to terms with the idea of chopping up Bambi, so Joshua would spend a little time fielddressing his catch. Hed generally come away with maybe a couple of bags of flour and a basket of eggs, as long as he had a basket to carry them away in. Well, the airships galley was rather more luxuriously appointed than any halfway house. There was a freezer with a sufficiency of bacon and eggs, and a dry cabinet stacked with sacks of salt and pepper. Joshua was impressed with this: on many worlds a handful of salt would buy you dinner and a nights shelter, and the pepper was even more valuable. Joshua got to work on the bacon. The voice of Lobsang startled him. Good morning, Joshua. I trust you slept well Joshua flipped his bacon and said, I dont even remember dreaming. Its as if we werent moving. Where are we now We are more than fifteen thousand steps from home. I have slowed the stepping for your comfort while you eat, and have steadied us at three thousand feet, occasionally going lower if the sensors find anything interesting. In many of the local worlds this morning its a sunny day with a bit of dew on the grasses below, so I suggest you finish your breakfast and come down to the observation deck and enjoy the view. By the way, there are sacks of muesli in the larder; Sister Agnes would, Im sure, want you to keep your bowel movements regular. Joshua glared at the empty air, given the lack of anyone to glare at, and said, Sister Agnes isnt here. Even so, [...] Content analysis details: (2.9 points, 5.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: timetobreakthebed.com] -0.0 SPF_PASS SPF: sender matches SPF record -0.0 SPF_HELO_PASS SPF: HELO matches SPF record 0.7 MIME_HTML_ONLY BODY: Message only has text/html MIME parts -1.9 BAYES_00 BODY: Bayes spam probability is 0 to 1% [score: 0.0000] 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message 1.9 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_E8_51_100 Razor2 gives engine 8 confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.5 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_51_100 Razor2 gives confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.9 RAZOR2_CHECK Listed in Razor2 (http://razor.sf.net/) 0.8 RDNS_NONE Delivered to internal network by a host with no rDNS 0.0 T_REMOTE_IMAGE Message contains an external image try this and then break the bed

   






These days a decent meal out in the stepwise worlds was pretty easy to obtain, for him; the pioneering steppers kind of liked to see him around, they knew his name and reputation, and treated him as if he were a lucky mascot. And a meal was always his for the asking from any of the halfway houses, the travellers lodges that were springing up across the nearer Earths. But it didnt pay to be a scrounger, Sister Agnes had always said, and so he always took a freshkilled deer along, or some wild fowl. The greener pioneers liked their meat fresh but had as yet not come to terms with the idea of chopping up Bambi, so Joshua would spend a little time fielddressing his catch. Hed generally come away with maybe a couple of bags of flour and a basket of eggs, as long as he had a basket to carry them away in. Well, the airships galley was rather more luxuriously appointed than any halfway house. There was a freezer with a sufficiency of bacon and eggs, and a dry cabinet stacked with sacks of salt and pepper. Joshua was impressed with this: on many worlds a handful of salt would buy you dinner and a nights shelter, and the pepper was even more valuable. Joshua got to work on the bacon. The voice of Lobsang startled him. Good morning, Joshua. I trust you slept well Joshua flipped his bacon and said, I dont even remember dreaming. Its as if we werent moving. Where are we now We are more than fifteen thousand steps from home. I have slowed the stepping for your comfort while you eat, and have steadied us at three thousand feet, occasionally going lower if the sensors find anything interesting. In many of the local worlds this morning its a sunny day with a bit of dew on the grasses below, so I suggest you finish your breakfast and come down to the observation deck and enjoy the view. By the way, there are sacks of muesli in the larder; Sister Agnes would, Im sure, want you to keep your bowel movements regular. Joshua glared at the empty air, given the lack of anyone to glare at, and said, Sister Agnes isnt here. Even so, guiltily, bearing in mind that nuns somehow knew what you were up to wherever you were, he rummaged in the larder and munched his way through dried fruit and nuts, with a side order of watermelon. Before he went back to his bacon. And made himself a fried slice to mop up the bacon fat. After all, it was chilly up here; he needed the fuel. Prompted by that thought, he went back to his stateroom. In its roomy closet, alongside the coldweather gear hed worn on arrival, he found a range of intermediate clothing, some of it in various camouflage patterns. Lobsang was thinking of everything, that was clear enough. He selected a parka and went down to the observation deck, and sat alone, watching Earths go by like a slideshow of the gods. Without warning, the ship crossed a sheaf of ice worlds. The light hit Joshua: dazzling, blinding sunlight reflecting from the ice and filling the air, as if the whole deck had suddenly turned into a flashbulb, with Joshua an insect trapped inside. The worlds below were plains of ice, gently folded, with only an occasional ridge of high ground shog as a dark bony stripe through the ice cover. And then into cloud, then hail, then sunlight again, depending on the local climate in each passing world. The flickering light was painful on the eye. From Earth to Earth the level of the ice cover rose and fell, he saw, like some tremendous tide. In each world the great ice sheet covering Eurasia must be pulsing, ice domes shifting, the southern edge rippling back and forth century by century; he was passing over snapshots of that tremendous continental flux. And when the ice band had passed and they were sailing over interglacial worlds, mostly he saw tree tops. The Long Earth was big on tree tops, Earth after Earth, tree after tree. Joshua seldom got bored. But as the morning wore on he was surprised to find himself grog bored now, so quickly. After all he was looking over thousands of landscapes no one, probably, had ever seen before. He remembered Sister Georgina, who liked her Keats: Then felt I like stout Corts when with eagle eyes He stard at the Pacific and all his men Lookd at each other with a wild surmise Silent, upon a peak in Darien. At the time hed thought a wild surmise was some kind of exotic bird. Well, he was now looking out over the new worlds with somewhat of a tame surmise. There were footsteps behind him. Lobsangs ambulant unit appeared. He was dressed for the occasion in safari shirt and trousers. And how quickly, Joshua reflected, Lobsang had become a he and not an it. It can be disorienting, cant it I recall my reactions to my own pioneer flight. The Long Earth goes on and on, Joshua. A surfeit of wonders will dull the mind. At random they paused at a world somewhere around twenty thousand. The sky here was overcast, threatening rain. Without the sunlight the rolling grassland below was a dull greygreen, with scattered clumps of darker forest. On this particular world Joshua could see no sign of mankind, not so much as a thread of smoke. Yet there was movement. To the north he saw a huge herd drifting over the landscape. Horses Bison Camels, even Or something more exotic And by the shore of a lake below he made out more groups of animals, a black fringe by the water. Now they had stopped, the Mark Twains systems went to work. Hatches on the gondola and on top of the envelope opened to release balloons, and buoys which fluttered to the ground under parachutes, each marked with the transEarth logo and the Stars and Stripes. There were even small soundingrockets that flew up with a hiss, creating streaky smoke columns in the air.






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