Return-path: Envelope-to: lojban@lojban.org Delivery-date: Fri, 15 Oct 2021 02:48:12 -0700 Received: from mail.benefitsretain.com ([72.19.14.48]:35125) by 36792b12ac38 with esmtp (Exim 4.94.2) (envelope-from ) id 1mbJow-000LPV-9X for lojban@lojban.org; Fri, 15 Oct 2021 02:48:12 -0700 DKIM-Signature: v=1; a=rsa-sha1; c=relaxed/relaxed; s=dkim; d=benefitsretain.com; h=Date:From:To:Subject:MIME-Version:Content-Type:List-Unsubscribe:Message-ID; i=maurice-richardson@benefitsretain.com; bh=rkQJum1Ec2ZEOIz3M3ez9Fn8dC0=; b=cBWQgL9e8zpZN3xeusd0zodPFZdmoJmIctGmqBRXMMF0CWQxWAs+UnEQ1DlbwQCGYNVn/3kXZgPl SS3JC2lArk+e/4gZ5oZNspzFDTyrGKmr0rrVqYRK3f90QJ5WkkE3oj627M3duUrVl7QePkIeOLEf 36+pEwvTvZWkc8U88R4= DomainKey-Signature: a=rsa-sha1; c=nofws; q=dns; s=dkim; d=benefitsretain.com; b=FFYXNaSbfNv0ItntLL9pIyMW24Ab2NgvEB72BxvUK2Bpe0PO6IMDFTtJMmXbXms47XxiGKnjzwwT GOMW5y2EbRLEXHUYwaKvtqzzOCtNu0KwYHXkmqW2UZZS9DrHQpccddBkQE7U7B91Q+qWUbSpllle I2UeA65WsU28ZqtkmbY=; Received: by mail.benefitsretain.com id hd57lg0001ga for ; Thu, 14 Oct 2021 16:57:44 -0400 (envelope-from ) Date: Thu, 14 Oct 2021 16:57:44 -0400 From: "Maurice Richardson" To: Subject: Six connections in one on a handy keychain MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_Part_1240_1832038102.1634243241418" List-Unsubscribe: Message-ID: <0.0.0.C7.1D7C13E22889050.19F7F7@mail.benefitsretain.com> X-Spam-Score: 4.4 (++++) X-Spam_score: 4.4 X-Spam_score_int: 44 X-Spam_bar: ++++ X-Spam-Report: Spam detection software, running on the system "1c83b5ee42e7", has NOT identified this incoming email as spam. The original message has been attached to this so you can view it or label similar future email. If you have any questions, see @@CONTACT_ADDRESS@@ for details. Content preview: ** Tired of having the wrong cables when you leave the house? ** The keychain is compatible with the majority of devices. The keychain is barely 1. 5 inches long, making it the tiniest keychain charging cord in the world. The powerful N52 magnets will snap safely [...] Content analysis details: (4.4 points, 5.0 required) pts rule name description ---- ---------------------- -------------------------------------------------- 0.0 URIBL_BLOCKED ADMINISTRATOR NOTICE: The query to URIBL was blocked. See http://wiki.apache.org/spamassassin/DnsBlocklists#dnsbl-block for more information. [URIs: benefitsretain.com] 1.9 URIBL_ABUSE_SURBL Contains an URL listed in the ABUSE SURBL blocklist [URIs: benefitsretain.com] -0.0 SPF_PASS SPF: sender matches SPF record 2.7 RCVD_IN_PSBL RBL: Received via a relay in PSBL [72.19.14.48 listed in psbl.surriel.com] 0.0 RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_L5 RBL: Very bad reputation (-5) [72.19.14.48 listed in bl.mailspike.net] 0.0 SPF_HELO_NONE SPF: HELO does not publish an SPF Record 0.8 DATE_IN_PAST_12_24 Date: is 12 to 24 hours before Received: date -5.0 RCVD_IN_DNSWL_HI RBL: Sender listed at https://www.dnswl.org/, high trust [72.19.14.48 listed in list.dnswl.org] 0.0 HTML_MESSAGE BODY: HTML included in message 0.0 HTML_FONT_LOW_CONTRAST BODY: HTML font color similar or identical to background 0.0 MIME_QP_LONG_LINE RAW: Quoted-printable line longer than 76 chars -0.1 DKIM_VALID_EF Message has a valid DKIM or DK signature from envelope-from domain -0.1 DKIM_VALID_AU Message has a valid DKIM or DK signature from author's domain -0.1 DKIM_VALID Message has at least one valid DKIM or DK signature 0.1 DKIM_SIGNED Message has a DKIM or DK signature, not necessarily valid 1.7 RAZOR2_CHECK Listed in Razor2 (http://razor.sf.net/) 2.4 RAZOR2_CF_RANGE_51_100 Razor2 gives confidence level above 50% [cf: 100] 0.0 RCVD_IN_MSPIKE_BL Mailspike blacklisted 0.0 T_REMOTE_IMAGE Message contains an external image ------=_Part_1240_1832038102.1634243241418 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=utf-8 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit ** Tired of having the wrong cables when you leave the house? ** ---------------------------------------------------------------- The keychain is compatible with the majority of devices. The keychain is barely 1. 5 inches long, making it the tiniest keychain charging cord in the world. The powerful N52 magnets will snap safely onto your keyring in this device's innovative magnet system. This device features a unique magnet system, the strong N52 magnets will snap safely onto your keyring. Buy Now 50% Off! -> http://www.benefitsretain.com/burnished-augment/26a4f2395mP86s10s5df7_a22s18yhscFDrfhscFDrEsvZ7aQaoRnm6O1ZS0P5jL0sv Wright & King Computing Services 612 E 89th St Brooklyn NY 11236-3440 Change Email Preferences http://www.benefitsretain.com/silicate-firearm/24c6E23Ys95jC8N612J5deIeYoa22Y18OhscFDrfhscFDrEsvZ7IQaoRnm5S10oT6aT0sJv ------=_Part_1240_1832038102.1634243241418 Content-Type: text/html; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable =20 =20 =20 =20 =20 =20 =20 =20 =20 =20
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Tired of having the wrong cables when you leave the house?

This cable keychain is a one-of-a-kind = way to keep track of all your cables. This keychain has six connections in = one and is compatible with the majority of current gadgets on the market. I= t also has powerful N52 magnets to keep it from falling off your keychain. = Get yours today, whether for yourself or as a gift!

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Buy Now For Free Shipping! =20
 
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Wright & King = Computing Services

612 E 89th St

Brooklyn NY 11236-3440

<= p> Change Email Preferences

ny, IBM.

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Three commercial astronauts sit ready = in the simulator standing by for the final launch sequence one last time be= fore tomorrow's big show. They're among the first who are supposed to be ma= king regular trips to and from nearby asteroid mining space-rigs. They set = the bar for all future efforts.

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The simulator is an exact replica of t= he real thing. Command can see the astronauts in their seats on a monitor, = face shields down and ready to rumble. The rest of the essential crew of en= gineers, coders, traffic control and operators can hear the interactions be= tween command and crew. The flight crew, in their stations, cannot hear all of the rest of the conver= sations.

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?Alright crew. We're about set for the final countdown to launch= Over.?

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?Roger that. Hey, Carlos? Over.?

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?Yeah, Andie. Over.?

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?How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep? Over,? Andie asks=

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?Lemme ask your mom. Over,? Quips Carlos

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A series of giggles that roll into waves of laughter are heard i= n the hot mics. Andie, Terry and Shannon all have a hearty belly laugh as t= heir shoulders and chests can be seen moving on the monitor with their laug= hter.

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Still giggling, ?C'mon, Carlos! You ROCKET! Over.?=

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Carlos is supposed to be the calm one on the radio. Like a 9-11 = dispatcher. It's his voice the crew relies on in emergencies and even he's = struggling to keep a straight face and remain professional.

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?Is everyone ready, now? It's not like you're leaving the planet= tomorrow, or anything important like that. Over.?

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?Yes s? Hey. Hey. I have a really stupid one I love,? Shannon in= terrupts Andie's reply with his distinctively deep Manilow-esque voice. Eve= ryone in command always ribs him about it.

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?How do you introduce a hamburger to a hot dog?? Without waiting= for a reply he continued, ?Patty. Meet Frank! Over.?

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Dead air.

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Everyone working on tomorrow's launch paused what they were doin= g for a moment. A lengthy couple synchronized seconds later faces turned up= wards into grins and a raucous laughter erupted all over the scientifically= professional buildings.

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?Do you think we got him?? Shannon could be heard amongst the la= ughs on board. Andie had to lift her face shield to wipe away the tears.

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On the security monitors of the rest of the facility, Carlos is = able to see how much everyone is enjoying this particular exchange after mo= nths of seriousness. This should be a serious exercise. If word got out, th= e investors may not be so lighthearted about it all. On the other hand, thi= s sure beats uncomfortable tension.

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Rubbing his forehead and shaking his head with a big dumb smile = Carlos calmly responds, ?Everyone thinks you're a real riot, but me. Resumi= ng countdown. Ten. Over.?

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?Knock. Knock. Over.? more giggling is heard from the profession= al astronauts in the expensive simulator.

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?We're still doing this, huh? Over.?

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Barely able to breathe through the contagious laughing Terry gas= ps back, ?Everyone else told theirs! Say it! Over.?

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?Who's there? Nine. Over.?

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?Joe. Over.?

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?Joe who? Eight. Over.?

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Heavy breathing, laughter and weird sounds come from the simulat= or as the Astronaut crew cannot contain their mirth. All shields are now up= , ?JOE MAMA! Bwaahaha? *gasp* ?Over!?

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Most of what is now coming through is a lot of noise. Who is say= ing what is no longer intelligible.

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?Seven! Why doesn't Six trust Seven?? someone, maybe Shannon, sq= uealed into their mic.

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The laughter around the whole place is now utterly uncontrolled.= Eyes are watering and dumb jokes are around every corner. This light mood = was needed last week. Not the day before they take off! This is supposed to= be the dress rehearsal! Somber, you know, like they're leaving tomorrow.

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Carlos is standing with his back to the monitor of laughing astr= onauts calmly, with a grin, taking in the scene of support staff equally in= hysterics.

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?Seven ATE nine!? a chuckling voice announced from somewhere.

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?Did seven eat nine? You have the entire crew rolling over here.= Over.?

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The crew is entirely beside themselves. Once this level of laugh= ter is released there is no containing it until it has run its course.<= /span>

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Finally, succumbing to the pressure of either the moment or the = laughter, Carlos lets loose. Really, he just can't even any more. The big s= how is tomorrow whether we get this simulation right or not.

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?What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Over.?

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?Carlos?! Is that you! Have you come to the dark side?! Over.? A= ndie asks between calming chuckles.

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?Finding half a worm. Over.?=20

 

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?Gross! Over.? Everyone on their still= hot mics has a fresh round of inspiration for jokes and the happy chatter = of pun exchanges renews.

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?You've just about laughed us all out = of a job today. Tomorrow is the real deal. You better be ready and hoping o= ur investors didn't catch wind of this. Over. ? Carlos began scolding as he= realized nothing at all was actually going to get done today.

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?It's a joke. Over.? said Terry.

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?Not a dick! Over.? Shannon chimed in.=

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?Don't take it so hard! Over.? finishe= d Andie.

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The place lit up again at Carlos's exp= ense and he turned off the public communications.

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?Get psyche in after the crew. I'm sure they're cool but tomorro= w is launch and I can't have them losing it when they get into Saturn's orb= it.? Carlos directed the medical team.

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?Cabrons?? he mutters in Spanish as he shuts down the failed sim= ulation because of a case of the giggles.

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In case you were wondering, our crew of comics made a very succe= ssful first space-rig run to an asteroid mine off one of the moons of Satur= n. They delivered their supplies and successfully returned with a load of p= latinum. Making their investors infinitely more wealthy.

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Their trailblazing mission in round-tr= ip travel so far into space launched a boom for interstellar mining and enc= ouraged the spread of human colonies well into our immediate solar system.<= /span>

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Shannon, with his baritone vocal chord= s asked upon leaving Earth's atmosphere, ?How do you  throw a party in= space? Over.?

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?You actually don't have to say over. = Over.?

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?You PLANET!?

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     Never in= my life did I ever expect to find myself in the state of Arizona, especial= ly being a girl from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I've always had a kindred = spirit and a yearning to travel, but little time or resources to do so. The= refore, I have not embarked much further from the City of Brotherly Love ex= cept for an impromptu trip to North Carolina a few years ago and my family = adventures into New York C= ity and the Jersey Shore when I was younger.  So when my fiance and I = radically decided to jump on my first ever plane ride to Arizona with only = a day's notice, I didn't think the people there would quite "get"= me.  That flight led us to the quaint, yet whimsical  town of Bi= sbee.  See, I describe myself as "a little hippy, a little hood&q= uot;.  I am from Philly after all, so that's where the "hood"= ; part of me comes from.  The "hippy" part, I'm told it's in= my soul.  I am a horse of a different color, so to say, no doubt abou= t that!      

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      My fiance had told me all ab= out the little town of Bisbee, Arizona about a year prior to all of this ha= ppening. He used to live fairly close a few years ago to help take care of = his Aunt who suffers from Alzheimer's Disease. I was told that I would abso= lutely love it there and that I would fit right in. From seeing pictures, I= could agree that my "hippy" side would be drawn to such a charmi= ng town. If the "hood" side was revealed, I'm pretty sure I would= be exiled! After all, even the people f= rom Philly could NOT handle my "Philly attitude"= , so how is this place supposed to?! I was about to find out. Lucky for me,= and everyone sitting in my general vicinity, I was too distracted by the f= act that this all was happening that I didn't even have time to have an act= ual panic attack. I guess that was one of the benefits of jumping on a last= minute flight across the entire United States. You always have to look for= that silver lining because everything happens for a reason. 

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     The plan= e ride there was probably the coolest thing I've experienced in my life. I = had never flown anywhere before. I wasn't nervous at all though. I was prob= ably way too overly excited for the other passengers, but what's the point = of life if you can't enjoy it, right? Besides, have you ever been on an air= plane around Christmas?! It is one of the prettiest sights you will ever se= e. I highly recommend everyone does this at least once in their lifetime. I= took the natural, breathtakingly beautiful experience as a sign that maybe= this trip wouldn't be so bad after all. Maybe, I should let go of my anxie= ties and believe that a greater power will guide us through this trip. Howe= ver, the unknown has always been an issue for me. Nonetheless, I was on a p= lane headed to Arizona regardless of my feelings about the uncertainty of w= hat will be.

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      To= my surprise entering Bisbee, I felt a sense of calmness come over me. = ; Looking at the people in this small town, I could tell they weren't at al= l like any I've ever met before.  Those in which society would call &q= uot;bums" were the most accepting of all!  We encountered many wo= nderful souls in this old, historic town; an old spirit, "Eyepatch Dav= e", another free spirit (whom I cannot recall his name), a heartwarmin= gly friendly, elder, homeless couple, and a lovely, older woman who offered= us fresh fruit and vegetables free of charge.  The kindness of these = so-called "vagrants" in this town was relieving.  Definitely= not something you see in my neck of the woods.  That's for sure!

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      Th= ere was one man that I saw while entering this so-called haunted town that = I was drawn to immediately.  He was the first person I saw there and g= reeted me with a huge smil= e in exchange to my head nod.  There was something different about thi= s vibrant, yet gentle, vagabond.  I just couldn't put my finger on wha= t it was yet.  However,  I was determined to find out.  I wa= s so intrigued by this man that I even made my fiance inquisitive too. = ; We just had to know more about him. 

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      Th= roughout our time in Bisbee, we continuously crossed paths with this man.&n= bsp; Every time he had a new, eccentric vibe; a makeshift walking stick, a = homemade "crown of thorns", a painting of Jesus hanging from his = back, or he would be wearing a priest's collar.  He would also "B= less" us during every encounter and even performed a little dance for = us in the city park.  I believe he has a lot to teach people.  Al= most like a modern day prophet.  Funny, all my life I was taught about= a prophet who walked the Earth among us many, many years ago.  They c= alled Him Jesus.  Jesus Christ is what He is most referred to as. = ; Now this may sound a bit absurd, but could this be the Bisbee Jesus? = ; If Jesus is among us again, this man may just be Him. After all, who are = we to say it's not?!

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      In this crazy, COVID infeste= d world, it's nice to believe in something besides all the bad.  The B= isbee Jesus gave me that credence that I desperately needed.  He also = made being across the country from everyone we know and love a little less = stressful.  Being away from everyone and everything you know, exce= pt one person, is extremely stressful during the holiday season with Christ= mas about a week away.  Christmas Day is the celebration of the birth = of Jesus.  Well, that's quite coincidental...or is it?  

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      We= are told Jesus is everywhere.  If He is among us once again, it would= make sense.  The way the world is going, He could "show up"= at any time, right?  They say it's happened before.  Today's soc= iety, riddled by unrest and uncertainty, could use a symbol of hope to ligh= t the way.  Maybe it's the time of the year that made me believe there= 's more than mental illness in this man, or maybe, just maybe, Jesus lives = in Bisbee, Arizona.

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