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[lojban-beginners] Re: Jingle Bells song
On Saturday, December 24, 2011 1:05:59 AM UTC+4, ianek wrote:
Very nice! I've translated some Polish songs before and I know how
much work it takes to fit it in the rhythm.
Some notes:
* shouldn't it be {te tonga} or {se janbe}? The former is easier to
fit in the rhythm.
I agree that in lojban the bell and the sound it emits are interconnected. But just singing {janbe lo'e} is a bit strange.
But if you have any alternative translations please post. I'll accept any precious amendment.
* {sakli}, not {sakla}
sorry
* "snow and fields" fills x4 in both {klama} and {cmila} and in the
latter it makes no sense.
ki'esai. Then I suggest
VERSION 2
Refrain:.u'i se janbe jevitno ca lo nuklama gi'e nenri felo sakli carce ku
First verse:
fo lo snime ku
.e lo foldi ku
fa mi klama .ije
stodi cmila .iu
I'm afraid that each verse must begin with ni'o or .i
Is it so ?
Any mistakes ?
Any suggestions for next verses ?
mu'o mi'e ianek
On 23 Gru, 08:17, gleki <gleki.is...@gmail.com> wrote:
> Several years ago there was an attempt to translate this song but without
> preserving the rhythm.
> So here is my attempt.
>
> Refrain:
> .u'i lo janbe ku
> tonga ca lo nu
> klama gi'e nenri fe
> lo sakla carce ku
>
> First verse:
> fo lo snime ku
> .e lo foldi ku
> fa mi klama gi'e
> stodi cmila .iu
>
> Any mistakes ?
> Any suggestions for next verses ?
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