[lojban-beginners] Re: Prose & Cacophony

[Robin Lee Powell <rlpowell@digitalkingdom.org>]

On Fri, May 02, 2003 at 07:54:04AM -0700, Guillermo Alc?ntara wrote:
> 
> coi mi'e .eipipuz
> 
> For a while I've been lurking lojban lists and yesterday I at last
> tried to write something on lojban. I wanted a new mail signature,
> kind of getting a quote.
> 
> na'e darsi le nu djica

Non-audacity, the desire

> tu'a le solri cu zvati le nicte lu'u

that something to do with the sun is at the nighttime (unnecessary
lu'u)

> ki'u le nu le kayjau le tarci cu mipri

With reason the tears (you want *kal*jau, btw) the star(s) hide.

> It stands, or tries to be something similar to:
> 
> Dare not to long,
> the sun at night, 
> 'cause tears hide stars.

Close enough for a first try.

> First of all I don't know if it's grammatically correct. 

It is when you fix kayjau.

> Second, I want opinions to give the utterance a better shape, like
> lojban golf as someone pointed out. 

Lojban golf?

> Third, don't know if it should have "ko" at the beginning if my
> intention is to have a mood as "know thyself". That phrase would
> be "ko djuna ko"?  

Or ko djuna do.  But yes, you want ko.  Here's how I would do it,
make of it what you will:

ko na darsi djica
le solri ca loi nicte
ki'u le du'u loi kaljau cu mipri loi tarci

> Forth, for me at least the part "ki'u le nu le ..." is a bit
> cacophonic is there a way out of it? 

Umm, yes: .i krinu la'e di'u fa le nu le ... or .i le nu le ... cu
krinu la'e di'u or something.

> Once I read that terminators are elidible to avoid sounding "ku ku
> cu"...

Depends on the situation.

-Robin

-- 
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