[lojban] Re: Elephants Dream first draft

["Matt Arnold" <lojban-out@lojban.org>]

These are good changes. I would apply them, but I think it would be
good if you do so, for the Wiki change log.
-epkat

On 8/10/06, HeliodoR <exitconsole@gmail.com> wrote:
> (Original lines marked with asterisks.)
>
> On Scene 1: Prologue.
>
> *{zu'a mi'o ka'e viska}
> This means "To the right of us an... is seeable."
> Similarly,
> *{ri'u mi'o ka'e viska}
> means "To the left of us etc."
> You can terminate the FAhA's with {ku} so You get
> {zu'aku mi'o ka'e viska}
> and
> {ri'uku mi'o ka'e viska}.
>
> *{.i roda snura si mulno snura}
> I think he's not correcting himself, but confirming
> what he has said:
> {.i roda snura .i prane snura}.
>
> *{doi .imos.}
> {.i} is needed: he begins a new phrase.
> Though here I would say
> {.i be'e .imos.}
> "Emo, may I go on talking to You?"
>
>
> On Scene 2: Switchboard Trap.
>
> *{na go'i xu do go'i}
> Two separate phrases:
> {na go'i .i xu do go'i}.
>
> *{.i ko .e mi klama}
> Then Emo nods and walks away to the opposite
> direction.
> {.i ko jo'u mi klama}
> "You! together with I go."
>
> *{ma se lidne}
> I haven't seen the movie, but isn't this rather
> {ca pu'o mo}?
>
> *{do ba viska .i do ba viska}
> {do ba viska .i do ja'a go'i}.
>
> Shall I do the changes?
>
> mi'e darves


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