[lojban] Re: Can you read this and tell me if it is correct?

["Colin Wright" <colin.wright@denbridgemarine.com>]

> de'i li 09 pi'e 09 pi'e 2008 la'o fy. arpgme .fy. cusku zoi skamyxatra.
>> Can you read this and tell me if it is correct?
> .skamyxatra
>

(snip lengthy and very helpful reply)

I think it's important to remember at this stage that
lojban is specifically designed to be different from
all known natural languages.  In most cases in a new
langauge you can point and say a single relevant word,
and people magically can understand most of what you're
trying to say.  If they don't they grunt, and you can
pick a different, random relevant word.

Natural languages are magic, and the more we study them
the clearer it is that they shouldn't work as well as
they do.  Somehow meaning is conveyed, almost mystically.

Lojban isn't like that, so the grammar and the structure
is important. It's fantastic that you're trying this out
and making an effort with just a dictionary.  Don't be
disheartened that your grammar now needs some work.

If you're into poetry, try making very, very short,
grammatically correct sentences that create the effect.
Long, ballad-like laments are one type, but consider
haiku.

And keep at it.  Very admirable.

mi'e kolin.
> First of all, you need to remember that sentences in Lojban *always* need
> to be
> separated with "{.i}" (or "{ni'o}/{no'i}").  Whitespace doesn't count.
> Also,
> due to the frequent lack of grammar, I had to guess at most of what you
> were
> trying to say and offered possible corrected translations for those
> meanings.
>
>> fanmo fe lo carvi .i jarco fe dilnu
> You left out a "{lo}/{loi}/{le}/{lei}" before "{dilnu}."  Also, as there
> is no
> {sumti} before these sentences' {selbri}, the x1 place is implicitly
> filled by
> "{zo'e}," so it's not necessary to label the next place with "{fe}."
>
>> le solri capu'o jarco le nenli'i pe le solri
>> ki'u mi tatpi mi kanla punli
> I'm not sure what you're tring to say here.  Assuming that the second line
> is a
> separate sentence and that "{ki'u}" (which means "because of reason/
> justification") is a typo for "{ku'i}" ("however"), it appears that you're
> trying to say something about your swollen eyes being tired, but it comes
> out
> as something nongrammatical & somewhat nonsensical.  If you are trying to
> say,
> "My swollen eyes are tired," that would be something closer to "{lo mi
> punli
> kanla cu tatpi}."
>
>> ku'i mi viska lo tsani
>> tsani melbi
> Literally, the second line translates as "(Observe) Sky-beautiful."  If
> you're
> trying to say that the sky is beautiful, that would be "{lo tsani cu
> melbi}."
>
>> mi ba cunso fe le cabna
> "I *will* be random at the *present* time"?  While grammatical, that seems
> semantically suspect.  Also, the "{fe}" here is unnecessary.
>
>> ki'u le cabna ba cfari balvi
> Assuming that the "{ki'u}" here is actually supposed to mean "because of
> reason" and is connected to the line before it (This is what happens when
> you
> don't delimit your sentences as required), "{le cabna ba cfari balvi}"
> needs to
> be made into a single {sumti} consisting of an abstraction; i.e., follow
> the
> "{ki'u}" with "{le nu}."  Also, you might want to rethink your wording
> here;
> perhaps "{le cabna co'a balvi}"?
>
>> bancu mu nanca levi seljdi ba vajninai
> If you're trying to say "after 5 years," use "{ba}" instead of "{bancu},"
> and
> you can then probably get rid of the "{ba}" later in the sentence.
> Secondly,
> I'm pretty sure that you can't attach "{nai}" to a {selbri}; "not
> important"
> would be "{na'e vajni}" (or "{na vajni}," but I don't think that's what
> you're
> trying to get across).
>
>> ja'e mi prami le cabna
> Again, you need to make the {bridi} into an abstraction {sumti} with "{le
> nu}."
> Either that or change "{ja'e} to "{.ija'ebo}."
>
>> .ijanai mi le djica fasnunai
> "...if my desire does not happen" is "{.ijanai le se djica be mi na
> fasnu}."
> Also, I'm not sure whether the result of your desire not happening is
> meant to
> be the sentence before or the sentence after.  Currently, it's the
> sentence
> before.  To make it the sentence after, one way would be to change
> "{.ijanai}"
> to "{.iganai}" and replace the "{.i}" between this sentence and the next
> with
> "{gi}."
>
>> mi xenrunai balvi
> Again, you can't attach "{nai}" to a {selbri}.  Also, assuming that you
> mean to
> say "I do not rue the future," that would be "{mi na xenru lo balvi}."
>
>> mi farlu cumki ku'i viska fe le jvinu
> "I can fall; however, I would see the view" (assuming that's what you
> mean)
> would be something like "{lenu mi farlu cu cumki .i ku'i mi viska le
> jvinu}"
> (Someone else should probably confirm the second part).
>
>> mi litru fe le jvinu
> You travel with the view as your route?  (Also, the "{fe}" is still
> unnecessary.)
>
>> .ijanai mi pu sfani
>> mi djica mi le djica  fasnu
> "I want my desire to happen" is "{mi djica lenu le se djica be mi fasnu}."
>
>> mi le djica
>> ba fasnu
> As before, "my desire" is "{le se djica be mi}."
>
>> mi ba jdice cumkinai balvi
> My best guess for what you're trying to say here is "I will decide on an
> impossible future," which would be something like "{mi ba jdice tu'a lo
> to'e
> cumki balvi}."
>
>> cabna mi djica prami
> "Now I desire love" is "{caku mi djica loka prami}."
>
>> mi cadzu ce'o mi cinba do
> I'm pretty sure that all this needs is a "{.i}" before the "{ce'o}."
>
>> do cinba mi ce'o mi gleki
> Again, you need a "{.i}" before the "{ce'o}."
>
>> mi ba cunso fe le cabna
>> ki'u le cabna ba cfari balvi
>> bancu mu nanca levi seljdi ba vajninai
>> ja'e mi prami le cabna
>> mi ba cunso fe le cabna
>> ki'u le cabna ba cfari balvi
>> bancu mu nanca levi seljdi ba vajninai
>> ja'e mi prami le cabna
> See my comments for the first use of these lines above.
>
>> Thank you, I wrote this with help of the dictionary.
> I think you should spend more time studying the grammar.
>
> mu'omi'e la'o gy. Minimiscience .gy.
> --
> mi pu klama .i mi pu viska .i mi pu fanva fi la lojban.
>
>
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> you're really stuck, send mail to secretary@lojban.org for help.
>
>



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