Re: [lojban-beginners] My attempt at a translation

[Remo Dentato <rdentato@gmail.com>]

Let's try this way:

ni'o fi'i doi tertigni da'oi pukcte
"Welcome to the audience. Wishing a pleasent night"

I don't feel it's important to specify "tonight", it's highly unlikely
that you want to address yesterday's audience :).  Vocatives  {fi'i}
and {da'oi} ("whishing") seems more natural to me.

.i mu'i la diklo ke fagri flalu mi jungau do lodu'u lo snura barkalri
ku zvati ti'a do
"According the 'local fire laws', I inform you that there are security
exits behind you"

I would treat "Local fire law" as a title for some collection of
rules, hence the {la}. Also, describing the exits as "fire exits" to
me seems more to describe them as the place where the fire will go
through. I would rather express them as {snura barkalri} (safe exits).

.i va'o da'i lo nu fagri kei pe'u ko tolxanka cliva
"In case of fire, please exit calmly"
(inspired by Pierre's answer :) )

remod.


On Wed, Jul 27, 2011 at 8:06 AM, Remo Dentato <rdentato@gmail.com> wrote:
> fi'i doi zasnir.
>
> Overall, it seems to me that it's a little bit too letteral.
>
> Anyway, you most probably want {cabycte seltigni} as you are welcoming
> them to the performance and not to the "night" (which is hard for me
> to understand what it could perform).
>
> The three gismu tanru {diklo fagri flalu} specify the (rules) for the
> (local fire) while you may want the (local rule) for the (fire) so it
> should be {diklo ke fagri flalu}.
>
> I'll try to work out an alternative so we could compare the two and
> see what comes out (I'm still rather slow ...)
>
> remod.
>
> On Tue, Jul 26, 2011 at 9:24 PM, Aaron H. <adhathome2001@gmail.com> wrote:
>>
>> English:
>>
>> Good Evening. Welcome to tonight’s performance. The local fire code
>> requires us to inform you that the fire exits are located behind you.
>> In the event of a fire please exit calmly. [This is not the exact fire
>> speech that we use but a reflection of the lojban version]
>>
>> Best (that I have figured out) lojban translation:
>>
>> FIRE SPEECH (travla fe le fagri):
>>
>> coi .i do zanvi'e mi le tigni cabycte .i le diklo fagri flalu cu
>> javni jungau do le barkalri ti'a do .i nu fagri kai pe'u do klama le
>> bartu
>

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